The sadness of beauty…
Beauty may be in the eye of the beholder, but is it any more impactful if you have someone to share it with or less if you don’t?
This question bounced around in my head as I bounced down a dirt road in the desert southwest on a road trip to the four corners area (Southern Utah). The landscape down there is amazing. Dramatic sandstone cliffs and rocks kissed by the sun giving off every color on the warm end of the spectrum — from bright yellows to deep red browns. All radiating heat and warmth in the crisp desert air. A wonderful contrast to the clear blue skies.
I was enjoying the scenery immensely as it rolled across my windshield. My mind, out of habit, wanted to go to the one that I used to be with. To the person that I would tuck these ‘beauty’ moments away to share and describe to later. That partner and I are no more. She, like me, had appreciated the beauty of the clouds and sky. The wound of that separation was still not fully scarred over and I felt an ache deep inside. The beauty made me sad. It also made me wonder if I felt or enjoyed the scenery any less without someone to share it with… Can we appreciate beauty just for beauty and not have the need to share it with anyone?
“It’s a sad and beautiful world.” -Jim Jarmusch
Do we value beauty more or are we impacted more by it if we have someone that we know would appreciate what we’re looking at? Do you recognize that cloud formation to look like a swan more because someone you once loved liked swans? Would you have noticed it otherwise? Does that make us appreciate it more? Do we see the world more through the personified lens of our loved ones? I’m not looking for answers. I’m not sure there are any or if this even matters. But it does make me wonder about what we appreciate in the context of just ourselves or something more if there’s someone we care about to share it with.
The thoughts I had out on that bumpy desert road — went the whole spectrum from amazement at beauty, to sadness of loss and back to appreciating the raw beauty of it for myself. I think ultimately it’s up to you. You can value what you see just for you and enjoy it in that context or you can view it in the context of those you love. I don’t think there is a right or wrong answer. I do lean more towards you should appreciate beauty for you. The main point of this whole thing could just be to turn away from whatever screen you’re looking at right now and go outside in nature and find some beauty to appreciate. Just for yourself or to share.
enjoy…
